This last doctor also did not want/neglected to refill my medication when I requested a refill. With this new institution, you have to wait until the app says you are allowed to request a refill--normal. This is typical for any medication. I filled it on the 23rd of August, and on the 11th of September, I noticed I was a little low, but not out, so I requested a refill as the app said I was allowed to do so. (I thought to myself, too many times, I let myself get to the last pill or two and get in a bind, not going to let that happen again.) On Friday, the 12th, I had an appointment with my doctor, so I thought it would be perfect timing. We had one appointment previously, but it was over the phone, I figured it would be good for us to meet, and I had clearly a variety of issues to discuss. I also put in for a refill for my other medication because I noticed it was up for a refill too.
The medical assistant noted my Rx requests in the system when she saw me, and usually at new institution, at the end of an appointment, you can go to the pharmacy, and pick up you medications. The doctor and I had a mostly good discussion, but he reiterated what he did on the phone the couple weeks or so before about narcotic medication. I told him about my orientation with the pain clinic, my old pain clinic, and my desire to find other methods for pain relief as I was concerned about what this one was doing to my body and it's decreased effectiveness. I was told some general information and that the pain clinic would handle this kind of thing, an appointment I would not have until October 3rd. He also, like the other doctors, did not have an interest in requesting my records from my doctor who was outside of this institution and therefore to which had no access.
Directly after my visit, I went to the pharmacy, the Rx has not been approved, and the other, my seizure medication will take some time because it is a special order. (I am sensitive to the generic and need the brand name.) By Monday, the 15, I am out of my medication. I had noted to him and his assistant that the medication is becoming less effective, as expected, so some days I can manage with the 2 pills a day, but others I take 3. On a terrible day once, I had to take 4. (That usually happens during that time of the month because of the hormones further worsening everything.) On other days, I'll manage with one and suffer. This is why I can't get it to stretch the entire 30 days, although I try.
On Tuesday, I get a call saying my Rxs are ready. I am already in withdrawal at this point, and I have my SO take me to the pharmacy. Only one medication is ready. My doctor still has not approved the pain medication. I don't actually get the medication until Wednesday evening, and I only find out it is filled because I called. Even though I have it now, I am still very sick and am having trouble eating. When a person goes through withdrawal, it's like food poisoning. Every time I tried to eat, I instantly regretted it. Now, I am afraid to eat, but I am starving. I have some PediaSure to hold me over, and I am hoping by the end today to recover.
Most frustrating of all, I have missed three days of work. That angers me more than anything. Going to my job everyday is my independence. I fought hard to get to the point where I am at, and when I am reduced to feeling like I both a mother worrying constantly about the countless needs of her infant who is also myself because I cannot eat, sleep, and sometimes do things for myself, I feel robbed. My job (in museum education) is one of my passions; I like being there. I need to make money, but if I didn't, I would elect to be there. I take this medication (that I don't like very much) to be a functioning member of society in hopes that there is a better solution out there for me one day.
There is some positive to all of this. I contacted my old pain clinic, I can afford to see my old doctor without insurance, and they can fit me in next week. To distract myself from the unpleasantness of being ill, I had some opportunity to work on something else I enjoy that applies to this space--3D printing! I'll have to find a way to connect my Instagram feed to here so you can actually see what I have been working on! I also want to thank those of you who have reached out to me on Facebook, the conversation is always appreciated! You keep me company when I'm down!
I don't know what difficulties I will face next or (better yet) what I will overcome, but I would like to continue to share them here with you alongside shop updates, 3D printing adventures, and a frilly thing here and there to keep things light and happy. Everyday, I try to remind myself that whatever I do, to do good. If I've ended the day doing something good, then I can feel okay with myself. When you are feeling stressed about your health like I do a lot and feel like you can't do much, remember this: Make good with your ability. I'll be here to help add the frills. ;)
Sorel Estrada Volpe